Monday, November 22, 2010


For the longest time, basically every day of my life I've thought, "If my body looks blah, blah, toner, fitter, skinner, blah, blah, then I'd be happy and life would be good." I would be able to buy new jeans, a tighter shirt, a new bikini, and I would stop wearing sweaters everywhere I went!  Then it turned into "If I just graduate, find a job, be a nurse,  get married, have a paycheck, then life will be simpler and I'll be happy."

How many times have we all said "If this then that......" How many times have we said "I'll wait until, I look this way, I make this much money, I lose this much weight...." then I'll enjoy life. 

The problem with that; if we wait "until" we're simply miserable and losing out on life now! 

How many events have you passed on because you we're feeling "fat" or started doing "two a days" because you ate "bad" I'm pretty sure a few of us! How many times have you sat at a party and felt anxious because you weren't sure if they would have food you could eat, or if you eat something it may stall your fitness goals. I'm pretty sure it's come up at least once or twice.  How many times have we berated ourselves for missing so many workouts – letting things turn from firm to squishy? How many times have we looked back at a week of meals and wondered how we got so very far off track? Or we stayed home because we felt to hideous to go out. 

I have missed friend's birthday party's, family functions, and date nights with fiance because I felt "fat" or because my jeans didn't fit right. There have been so many times a fun shopping trip turned into my crying in my car because a pair of jeans didn't fit and it ruined my whole day. I would go back and just say "Well If I didn't eat that I wouldn't feel this way, or if I just lose this life will be good." Fiance even gets the worst of it, he deserves better.  I have beaten myself for enjoying a cookie, or tasty treat at a function, or at times for missing a workout. Funny thing is, I'm smart enough to know one "bad" meal or missing a workout out or two won't hinder my diet or make me gain 200lbs, in fact in may even help me, 

Whether it's feeling fat in a pair of jeans or wishing my tummy were flatter and my legs were slimmer I've missed out on a lot in life. Instead of embracing what God has given me, I have torn it down. I have made myself believe that I am not good enough. And that's a lie, I'm plenty good enough. The worst thing is, having this mindset and attitude can put you in a depressing state. Then we get stuck here, and we can't get out, and we end up missing on life's enjoyments, birthday party's, girls night out, a date with your man. You miss out on life because you're so focused on what you look like. Now we should want more for ourselves, we should want to get our bodies into good healthy shape, want to be healthy and look good – but we shouldnt' feel bad about ourselves "until" we get there. We need to embrace ourselves. Love ourselves and know we are strong. I'm pretty sure we have family and friends, and our "husbands/boyfriends/fiances" telling us we're "hot, gorgeous, perfect." So instead of fighting it, embrace it. Embrace who you are! 

The reason for this post is because I realized I have 8 weeks till race day, 3 weeks till graduation, 11 months till my wedding, and thanksgiving in 3 days! I have beat myself up for not eating "clean" enough that past few days or weeks, for indulging in sweets with the fiance, and missing a run. I keep saying "I should have been this weight by now." and almost started the morning unhappy. But then I sat and realized what I do have, a home, a family, an amazing fiance, an adorable boxer, food on my table, the ability to go to school, sleep in a warm bed, and most of all my health. I can get up and run, workout, walk, enjoy the day, I get to breath today. If I don't start embracing that now, life will pass me up and I would never have enjoyed what's in front of me now. 

So with the holidays right around corner, enjoy that piece of turkey, those mashed potato's, and amazing delicious pie because you deserve it. And trust me you won't fall off that wagon! Enjoy the body you have now and the life you have now...stop living "Until" and start living for "Now" because tomorrows is never promised. Enjoy the holidays and indulge :) 

I realized today I work out, train like an athlete, run an insane amount of miles, it healthy (on most days lol)! But most of all I have a family and an amazing man who love me. I may not be skinny, I may not have the flattest tummy, or even the skinniest legs, but I am healthy. I am ME! 

My motivation for today; the people who love me and believe in me! 

and this picture :) 

Question: What's your motivation?!?! 


  1. Val, I've always admired your discipline to work out and stay healthy. I really want you to know that your body is just amazing and you have everyone around you thinking so too! Don't feel guilty for eating what you want, you work hard to deserve it!

  2. Oh my gosh were you in my thoughts?! Every day I always say that I will wait for this and that. That if I would have then, this.

    Just the other day I remembered how last year we had talked about me running with you this year and what happened? I didn't. I always let myself get down when I just need to push myself. I really feel that your blog is motivating me. I'm eating better and I am making plans. I'm a girl that needs a plan to get it all started and done with.

    Val, your beautiful and there is no way that you should ever be upset with the way you look! :)